Caption Contest

May 19, 2005: Caption Contest

Caption Contest

Superman: What do you do with a druken sailor? Green Lantern: What do you do with a drunken Sailor? Both in Unison:What do you do with a druken sailor? Batman (in high pitched voice): Early in the Mornin.

Bravo, Superlycan. It was genius. The thought of Batman with that voice was priceless, and still has me giggling. And now for everyone else who was superbly impressive this week.

The runner-ups:

Batman: *&^%$ Joker and his &*^%$ giant washing machine...


Remember, kids, it's funny to curse as long as you use unpronouncable symbols in lace of real letters. Hey, it works for Beetle Bailey. Hey, Neal, is there a relation there, or would admitting to being connected to Hi and Lois be too evil for you?

Oh, nothing beat being beaten up as a kid to the tune of "Won't you come home, Beetle Bailey?" And I had REPRESSED those memories! Nyah!

As the Bat and Supes keep stand tall, Green had too much sugar and humps the air yelling "COOOOMMMME ONNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Batman: I can't believe that I am going to prison for not listening to Blue Beetle! Superman: Bruce you have always been a good friend but they have a point, it sounds like criminal negligence to me. Green Lantern: Hey prison isn't that bad. I had to go there after my killing spree. I got this great physique and a cool nickname. They call me Tater Salad.

I don't know why this makes me laugh. It just does.

Hal: Aw man... I =HATE= season cliffhangers! Batman: At least YOU didn't gain a hoverboard riding dog this year. I have to use this matching board and chase him with a scoop and baggie.

Superman Action Figure: (as controlled by Neal Bailey, to Wonderwoman doll offscreen): Now, Wonderwoman, I have you in my clutches! Wonderwoman figure: No, go away! I don't want to.and yet I find you strangely attractive. Superman figure: Of course you do! Amazonian princesses are often attracted to tights and super powers, and I have both, and you know it! (Suddenly CyberV appears in the doorway and clears his throat loudly. Startled, Neal scrambles to hide his toys.) Neal: CyberV! How long have you been standing there? What did you see?! CyberV: Nothing, Lord Bailey! I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!

Superman: Who's the new artist? Batman: Isn't it obvious? It's Liefeld. The anatomy, the perspective. Arrgh! Green Lantern: I gotta admit: this stuff gets me pumped!!!

Superman: All in favor of sitting back and letting the Marvel Legends handle this, say Aye. All: AYE. Captain America: Curse our superior poseability!

Superman: That's the last time we let you make a wish for all of us. Green Lantern: It's not my fault you guys didn't want breasts.

JLA: The Movie, directed by Joel Shumacher. In this version, the one in the green is Superman and the one with the yellow around his "S" is Green Lantern. Yes, that's right, yellow.

Batman: I am an action figure. Superman: I am also an action figure. Green Lantern: As am I. (awkward silence for several minutes) Batman: Soooooo, how about that local sports team, eh?

This would be the second place caption. Gaze in awe at it's simplicity. Then put the pitchforks down. Beating me up won't help you win.

Hannibal King
Green Lantern: Oh thats great. Batman's only weakness is that he's human. Superman is screwed because of Kryptonite, but look at me... I can't even fight Big Bird or I'll get my butt kicked.

Superman: Hey, Hal, look at Bat-Wimp over there. GL: Yeah. Hasn't even died once yet. Loser.

The Legion of Supermanhomepage Heros, Super Steve, Batty Baily and Green Aaron.

I'm more of a purple, m'self. Of course, when i was younger, I'd tape numeral 4's to all my shirts and pretend I was Mr. Fantastic. Then I'd get beaten up and have my lunch money stolen.

Not pictured here: 8.5" Plastic Man Action Figure. Useful powers not included.

Batman: Toyman, you fiend! You've turned us into action figures! What are you planning? Toyman: Isn't it obvious? I'm creating the worst caption picture ever! Superman: You're a monster! Let's get him, Hal! Green Lantern: Eh.sorry, this is your homepage not mine. I've got my own problems. Batman: Like trying to redeem yourself after all the people you killed? Superman: Subtle, Bruce. Real subtle.

I'd also like to applaud Lea-El for being observant enough to twig to the realization that Neal and I have very different styles when it comes to the selection of contest pictures. Although I thought most people woulda realized it when I had you mocking Krypto and Mad Magazine instead of Clark and Lana. In any case, my time is done for this week. I'll be back in two weeks with a new image designed solely to warp your minds and make you cry for your mommies. I'll leave you with this final thought... Cannibals are great conversationalists. They love to chew the fat.

BTW, Ionesky, you get an GINORMOUS stinky sock this week, you know why!

Until the next time, I remain

Aaron (CyberV) Thall

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