July 28, 2021

Caption Contest

January 14, 2007: Caption Contest

Caption Competition

Winner:
last man of krypton
Al: I know the fans think we have no right to produce Smallville, but I believe I've written some scripts for the rest of the season that will make everyone happy.
Miles: How so?
Al: Lana dies, Clark starts being proactive and stops whining, Lionel leaves Martha alone, Green Arrow goes back to Star City and Lois stops showing her breasts off.
Miles: Intriguing... can I see it?
Al: Sure. I've only got the one copy though so be careful with it. I can't remember exactly how it goes.
Miles: Okay. Where is it?
Al: First office on the left in that building.
*KABOOM*
Al: ......what were my ideas again?
Miles: I think you said something about Lois showing her breasts off.
Al: Yes! It's genius! More breasts!

And the runner-ups:

neal bailey
Lex smelt it...the justice league* dealt it.

*Justice League consists of a Green Arrow who juices, a Flash who Steals, an Aquaman who's a valley boy, and a Cyborg without a cannon. May include a Chloe Oracle. (NO REFUNDS!)

SuperWT
Option 1
Walk away in a cool slow motion pose

Option 2
Save everyone in the building we just blew up

Choice
Option 1
It will make a great desktop background

Shaun_C
"That's every copy of Cheaper By The Dozen; now for The Fog!"

Gislef
We're not your daddy's Justice League, bucko. We kick a$s, carry boot knives, and indulge our pyromania.

Red Hobbes
"Uhm... Go-Go Power Rangers...? Guys? Guys?"

BigEvil_6686
Clark: "Guys?"

ALL: "IT'S MORPHIN' TIME!"

cyberv
"SUPERMAN!"

"FLASH!"

"GREEN ARROW!"

"CYBORG!"

"AQUAMAN!"

Everybody: "JUSTICE LEAGUE!"

(insert explosion)

Red Ranger: ...I still say it needs multicolored smoke to make it perfect. And your poses are so generic...

Clark: We could do it again... We can do it again, right? (pause) The producers say no. And to get off our set.

sneakymonkey
This is exactly why nobody wants to bowl against these guys.

Sven-El
Clark: So everybody knows what to do right?
All: Right.
Clark: Now let's review: I'll go pine over Lana to some one who really doesn't care. Ollie, you'll go and try to romance Lois though it won't work. Vic, you and Bart can go be out of continuity. Arthur, umm, you can go talk to some fish."
Arthur: Grrrrrr.

cyberv
Clark: (hums the theme to "Justice League" )

Kryptonian52
Clark: Okay everybody, "Weeeerrrreeerrr oooofffff to see the Wizard......"

dkbates
Only you can prevent bad scripts.(unseen transcripts from Smoky the bear).

DougEl
(pause)

*lick*

Ow! Hot hot hothotHOT!!

DougEl
Bart: Um, guys? Shouldn't we go check out the explosion? See if anyone's hurt? Aren't we heroes? Isn't that what we do?
Clark: No, just ignore it. It's the show's credibility, going up in flames.
Bart: But...
Clark: Just keep walking, Bart. Just keep walking.

cyberv
Singing: WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS! WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS! THERE'S NO TIME FOR LOSERS, CAUSE WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS... OF THE WORLD!

Aquaman: ...I thought we were the Justice League.

Flash: (smacks Aquaman upside the head) Idiot.

cyberv
Clark: ...Wait, there's a black guy on the set, and he's not supposed to die or be evil? (pause) SECURITY!

Elsewhere, Sam Jones III gives his tv screen a dirty look.

sneakymonkey
All of a sudden, Linda Lake materializes out of a pool of water nearby. She and Aquaman lock eyes.

Cue Music: Oh, sweet mystery of life at last I've found you...

emerald_knight
Clark: If we're the JUSTICE league, can we start with Lana? She's gotta be into double figures on manslaughter alone...

badboy1230
[singing]

ALL:"We're men...We're men in tights...."

Clark: "Hmm. Not bad idea.."

sneakymonkey
AC: Why am I the one who always ends up being the butt of all the jokes?

Green Arrow: It certainly couldn't be because of your cool, manly powers, there, Dances With Walruses.

AC: No really! I'm not that lame. Why does everyone pick on me?

Clark: Let's put it this way. You're the only hero I've ever known to be taunted with a glass of water. You are that lame.


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