Mild Mannered Reviews - Classic Pre-Crisis Superman Comics

Action Comics #484
Cover date: June 1978
Writer: Cary Bates
Penciller: Curt Swan
Inker: Joe Giella
Cover: Jose Luis Garcia Lopez
"Superman Takes a Wife!"
Reviewed by: Rafael Magat
Once upon a time in Metropolis long ago and far away... a group of people look up in the sky and are shocked by what they see, not a bird, not a plane, but the Mechanical Marauders, human sized flying robots. The Marauders have just stolen money from a bank. Someone notices that they're getting away and another asks where Superman is, just then he flies in to save the day! Superman knocks one Marauder's head off and the people realize that Superman has come! The Marauders fire lasers at Superman but Superman simply continues on destroying the robots, he begins to spin himself and the damaged robot, then throws it into the rest of the Marauders, just then someone says that Superman is unstoppable, but one man disagrees, this man is Colonel Future, leader of the C-F gang. One of his minions says that hundreds have tried but failed at killing Superman. Colonel Future then vows that he will be the one to wipe out the Man of Tomorrow.
Twenty-one minutes later, Superman flies into the thirtieth floor of the Daily Star and changes into Clark Kent in the storeroom, upon exiting, Jimmy Olsen comments on Clark's speediness in getting from the site of the defeat of the Mechanical Marauders to the Daily Star, Clark says that he found a way to stay on top of the traffic.
As Jimmy and Clark walk away, a female figure steps into the storeroom Clark changed in, thinking to herself that Clark may be able to fool Jimmy Olsen easily but not a news-hen such as herself. She wonders about Clark's fondness for the storeroom. It's Lois Lane, and she is removing an automatic movie camera she rigged up that morning. Lois takes the film to be developed only to learn that every frame has been fogged up as if they were exposed to intense x-rays. The developer says that it isn't likely and that she probably got stuck with defective film. Lois thinks to herself that Clark used a quick flash of x-ray vision to destroy the evidence, and vows that she will someday prove that Clark Kent is Superman.
Three days later in a room somewhere in Metropolis, two C-F men bring in a villain known as The Wizard to see Colonel Future. Colonel Future asks if he used "weird spells" against the JSA, what some might call magic. The Wizard asks if by magic he means things science cannot explain, he then turns the room upside-down, and says yes. The colonel is pleased. The Wizard asks why he was brought here, Colonel-Future then tells him that he brought him here so that he could remove Superman from the face of the Earth, Wizard asks him what they have to offer and they give him the Glatsonbury Wand, Wizard says that he already has it, Colonel- Future says that it's a fake. The Wizard then realizes that his is fake and says that he'll have to test it first and announces that he is a man of his word.
The next day, Lois and Clark walk on the street as Lois says tells Clark that they could work out a plan to nab C-F and get an exclusive for the Star. Clark tells Lois to leave him out and Lois says that he has incredibly good posture for someone without a spine. Clark pushes Lois out of the way of a blast and she wonders if his shove was accidental or deliberate. The blast hits an armored car and two C-F men with high-powered bazookas run past Lois and Clark and head for the truck. Lois gets up and wonders where Clark is. In a narrow alley a mugger prepares to mug Clark as he changes to Superman. Clark rips open his shirt and accidentally hits the mugger with his elbow knocking him unconcious. Superman flies out as the C-F gang members fly off using their bazookas as prepulsion. Superman quickly catches them and welds their bazookas together with his heat vision.
Just then the Wizard begins to cast his spell to rid the world of Superman, casting it on the S emblem. Superman begins to lower the two men and is whisked away to the emblem, Superman tells the Wizard that nothing on Earth can harm him, the Wizard counters that his magic isn't from Earth and he rids the world of Superman.
Hours later Clark Kent walks out of the emblem and walks toward Metropolis. At the Star, George Taylor, editor, asks where Superman is, Clark tells him that they were alright without him before and that they'll still manage. Lois ponders if that is really Clark Kent talking and indeed it is! In the following weeks, Clark proves himself to be a dauntless foe of crime! Clark even investigates Superman's disapperance. And when nothing can be found, Clark admits that they do need Superman against the C-F gang. Lois tells him that he's done more than what most people would attempt in fighting crime. Clark says that he needs to relax and asks Lois out on a date. Lois agrees.
The dates become more frequent and soon romance blossoms, Clark asks Lois if they could take a country drive, Lois agrees. Inside Clark's car, Clark proposes to Lois. Lois says yes and they liplock. They get married and enjoy their honeymoon at the beach, where Lois thinks to herself that she learned what love really is from Clark. Clark takes a dip in the sea where he is targeted by a C-F sub. They fire at Clark who doesn't even feel it. Lois screams "NOOOOOOO!" and the C-F men think that there's something wrong with the gun and submerge. Clark runs to hug Lois, who thinks that he's about to collapse but instead they hug and Calrk tells Lois that she has very luscious shoulders. Lois is confused and later that night, Lois tries to cut Clark's hair with scissors which break and thus Lois realizes that Clark Kent is Superman!
After flying back to Metropolis, Lois goes over the files of the villains who claim to have rid the world of Superman, Lois goes for someone Superman would never suspect, such as the Wizard! Lois goes to visit the Wizard who is now homeless and lives on a bench in Metropolis Park. Lois convinces the Wizard to prove that he sent Superman away by bringing him back. At the Kent house, Lois thinks to herself that she likes Clark the way he is. The next day Lois kisses Clark on the cheek as he sleeps. At Metropolis Park, Lois announces to the world that the Wizard was the one who took Superman away and that he will bring Superman back. The crowd mocks the Wizard as he casts the spell to bring Superman back. Just then Clark wakes up and then disappears in a flash as the S emblem where Superman left begins to emit smoke as the Wizard finishes his spell, a familiar figure flies upward away from the site for, SUPERMAN RETURNS!
The crowd begins to hear a whistling sound as they look up in the sky, to find not a bird, not a plane, but Superman!
Superman waves his hand at the Wizard who is knocked cold. Elsewhere, Colonel Future says that he's going to be sick as a minion gives him medicine.
At the Kent house, Superman comforts Lois, who tells him that he should admit that if it hadn't been for the Wizard, they never would have wed, Superman admits it and tells her that if it hadn't been for the Wizard, he would never have realized how much he always loved her and asks her to marry him, the Kryptonian way!
So off they go heading towards Superman's secret citadel in a mountainous region of the world. Inside Superman and Lois wed by exchanging specially chosen bracelets while standing on top of the jewel of truth and before statues of Jor-L and Lora.
Story - 5: Wow, first review, this makes me the youngest at 13. Anyway, as we all know, this entire issue is incredibly important to Infinite Crisis because with the union of these two, Superman of Earth-2 was fooled into believing Alex, fighting our Superman and affected me emotionally as I saw Earth-2 Superman die. So that's two points for that, one point for finding a way to allow them to wed and satisfy us, even thought the real deal wouldn't happen until '96. Another point for finding a way to get rid of Superman in a cheesy but highly plausible way and for showing what could happen to a villain upon accomplishing the goal of defeating the hero and half a point for the scene in which the mugger gets knocked out. Rounded off, 5.
Art - 4: Okay, Swan and Giella, here were bad in a few panels, especially the eyes. In one shot, Superman's eyes are like tiny little beads with white. In another, Clark's eyes are the same. That and in the look up in the sky bit before the Mechanical Marauders, one of the hands is really awkwardly drawn. 99% of the blame, goes to the inker, while 1% goes to Swan for the hand.
Cover Art - 4: Beautiful piece of art by Jose Luis Garcia Lopez, but it didn't happen and it looks cluterred but it is mighty pretty.
Pre-Crisis Superman Comic Book Reviews
1938-1949
- Action Comics #1 (June 1938)
- Action Comics #2 (July 1938)
- Action Comics #3 (August 1938)
- Action Comics #4 (September 1938)
- Action Comics #5 (October 1938)
- Action Comics #6 (November 1938)
- Action Comics #7 (December 1938)
- Superman Archives: Volume 1 (1939)
- Superman #1 (Summer 1939)
- Action Comics #8 (January 1939)
- Action Comics #9 (February 1939)
- Action Comics #10 (March 1939)
- Superman #13 (November/December 1941) - The Archer
- Superman #19 (November/December 1942) - Case of the Funny Paper Crimes
- Action Comics #60 (May 1943) - Lois Lane - Superwoman
- Superman #30 (September/October 1944) - The Mysterious Mr. Mxyztplk
- Action Comics #80 (January 1945) - Mr. Mxyztplk Returns
- Superman #38 (January/February 1946) - The Battle of the Atoms
- Superman #42 (September/October 1946) - The Death of Clark Kent
- Superman #45 (March/April 1947) - Lois Lane, Superwoman
- Superman #53 (July 1948) - The Origin of Superman
- Action Comics #124 (September 1948) - A Superman of Doom
- Superman #60 (December 1949/January 1950) - The Two Identities of Superman & Superman Fights the Super-Brain
1950-1959
- Superman #76 (May/June 1952) - The Mightiest Team in the World
- Superman #80 (January/February 1953) - Superman's Lost Brother
- Superman 3D (1953) - The Man Who Stole the Sun, Origin of Superman and The Man Who Bossed Superman
- Superman #87 (February 1954) - The Prankster's Greatest Role
- Superman #88 (March 1954) - The Terrible Trio
- Superman #89 (May 1954) - Captain Kent the Terrible, Superman of Skid Row, and One Hour to Doom!
- Superman #91 (August 1954) - The Superman Stamp and Great Caesar's Ghost
- World's Finest #88 (May/June 1957) - Superman and Batman's Greatest Foes
- Superman #115 (August 1957) - The Midget Superman!
- Superboy #65 (May/June 1958) - The Amazing Adventures of Krypto Mouse
- Action Comics #242 (July 1958) - The Super-Duel in Space
- Superman #123 (August 1958) - The Girl of Steel
- Superman #127 (February 1959) - Titano the Super Ape
- Action Comics #252 (May 1959) - The Menace of Metallo and The Supergirl From Krypton
- Superman #129 (May 1959) - The Girl in Superman's Past
- Superman #130 (July 1959) - The Curse of Kryptonite!, The Super-Servant of Crime!, and The Town that Hated Superman!
- Jimmy Olsen #40 (October 1959) - Jimmy Olsen, Supergirl's Pal
1960-1969
- Superman #134 (January 1960) - The Super-Menace of Metropolis
- Jimmy Olsen #42 (January 1960) - The Big Superman Movie!, Perry White, Cub Reporter!, and Jimmy the Genie!
- Jimmy Olsen #44 (April 1960) - The Wolf-Man of Metropolis
- Adventure Comics #271 (April 1960) - How Luthor Met Superboy
- Jimmy Olsen #46 (July 1960) - Jimmy Olsen, Orphan
- Superman #141 (November 1960) - Superman's Return To Krypton
- Superboy #85 (December 1960) - The Impossible Mission
- Jimmy Olsen #51 (March 1961) - The Girl with Green Hair
- Jimmy Olsen #52 (April 1961) - Jimmy Olsen, Wolf-Man
- Superboy #89 (June 1961) - Superboy's Big Brother!
- Action Comics #279 (August 1961) - The Super-Rivals
- Superman #147 (August 1961) - The Legion of Super Villains
- Superman #149 (November 1961) - The Death of Superman!
- Jimmy Olsen #57 (December 1961) - Jimmy Olsen Marries Supergirl
- Superman #155 (August 1962) - Superman Under the Green Sun and The Downfall of Superman
- Justice League of America #13 (August 1962) - Riddle of the Robot Justice League
- World's Finest #129 (November 1962) - Joker-Luthor, Incorporated
- Superman #158 (January 1963) - Superman in Kandor
- Superman #160 (April 1963) - The Mortal Superman
- Superman #161 (May 1963) - The Last Days of Ma and Pa Kent
- Superman #162 (July 1963) - The Amazing Story of Superman-Red and Superman-Blue
- Superman #163 (August 1963) - Wonder-Man, the New Hero of Metropolis and The Goofy Superman
- Justice League of America #21 & #22 (August/September 1963) - Crisis on Earth-One! and Crisis on Earth-Two!
- Superman #164 (October 1963) - The Showdown Between Luthor and Superman
- Superman #165 (November 1963) - The Sweetheart Superman Forgot
- Superman #166 (January 1964) - The Fantastic Story of Superman's Sons
- Superman #167 (February 1964) - The Team of Luthor and Brainiac
- Superman #168 (April 1964) - Luthor - Super Hero and Lex Luthor, Daily Planet Editor
- Superman #169 (May 1964) - The Man Who Stole Superman's Secret Life
- Action Comics #314 (July 1964) - The Day Superman Became The Flash
- Justice League of America #29 & #30 (August/September 1964) - Crisis on Earth-Three! and The Most Dangerous Earth of All!
- Superman #173 (November 1964) - The Triumph of Luthor and Brainiac
- Action Comics #318 (November 1964) - The Death of Luthor
- Action Comics #319 (December 1964) - The Condemned Superman
- Superman #175 (February 1965) - Clark Kent's Brother
- Superman #181 (November 1965) - The Superman of 2965
- The Legion of Super-Heroes - Archives Volume 4 (1965)
- Superman #184 (February 1966) - The Demon Under the Red Sun
- Action Comics #338 (June 1966) - Muto - Monarch of Menace
- Action Comics #339 (July 1966) - Muto versus The Man of Tomorrow
- Superman #189 (August 1966) - Krypton Lives Again
- Action Comics #346 (February 1967) - The Man Who Sold Insurance to Superman and The Case of the Superman Imposter
- Superman #194 (February 1967) - The Death of Lois Lane
- Superman #196 (May 1967) - The Star of Steel
- Superman #199 (January 1967) - Superman's Race With The Flash
- Superman #200 (October 1967) - Super-Brother Against Super-Brother
- The Flash #175 (December 1967) - Race to the End of the Universe
- Justice League of America #63 (June 1968) - Time Signs a Death Warrant for the Justice League
- Superman #211 (November 1968) - The Name of the Game is Superman!
- Superman #215 (April 1969) - Lois LaneŠ DeadŠ Yet Alive
1970-1979
- Superman #224 (February 1970) - Beware the Super-Genius Baby
- Action Comics #393 (October 1970) - Superman Meets Super-Houdini! and The Day Superboy Became Superman!
- Jimmy Olsen #133 (October 1970) - The Newsboy Legion
- Action Comics #394 (November 1970) - Midas of Metropolis and Requiem for a Hot Rod!
- World's Finest #198 (November 1970) - Race to Save the Universe!
- Action Comics #395 (December 1970) - The Secrets of Superman's Fortress and The Credit Card of Catastrophe
- Jimmy Olsen #134 (December 1970) - The Mountain of Judgement!
- World's Finest #199 (December 1970) - A Race to Save Time!
- Superman #233 (January 1971) - Superman Breaks Loose!
- Jimmy Olsen #135 (January 1971) - The Evil Factory!
- Superman #234 (February 1971) - How to Tame a Wild Volcano
- Jimmy Olsen #136 (February 1971) - The Saga of the D.N.Aliens
- Superman #235 (March 1971) - The Sinister Scream of the Devil's Harp
- Superman #236 (April 1971) - Planet of the Angels and The Doomsayer
- Jimmy Olsen #137 (April 1971) - The Four-Armed Terror!
- Superman #237 (May 1971) - The Enemy of Earth
- Superman #238 (June 1971) - Menace at 1000 Degrees
- Jimmy Olsen #138 (June 1971) - The Big Boom!!
- Superman #240 (July 1971) - To Save a Superman
- Jimmy Olsen #139 (July 1971) - The Guardian Fights Again!!!
- Superman #241 (August 1971) - The Shape of Fear
- Superman #242 (September 1971) - The Ultimate Battle
- Jimmy Olsen #141 (September 1971) - Will the Real Don Rickles Panic?!?
- Jimmy Olsen #142 (October 1971) - The Man from Transilvane!
- Jimmy Olsen #143 (November 1971) - Genocide Spray
- Jimmy Olsen #144 (December 1971) - A Big Thing in a Deep Scottish Lake!
- Superman #247 (January 1972) - Must There Be A Superman
- Jimmy Olsen #145 (January 1972) - Brigadoom!
- Jimmy Olsen #146 (February 1972) - Homo-Disastrous!
- Jimmy Olsen #147 (March 1972) - A Superman in Super-Town!
- Jimmy Olsen #148 (April 1972) - Monarch of All He Subdues!
- Superman #292 (October 1975) - The Luthor Nobody Knows!
- Action Comics #458 (April 1976) - Make Me a Super-Hero! and Masquerade of the Nutty Kid!
- Superman vs. Muhammad Ali (Spring 1978)
- Action Comics #484 (June 1978) - Superman Takes a Wife!
- Superman #328 (October 1978) - Attack of the Kryptonoid
- Action Comics #489 (November 1978) - Krypton Dies Again and Where There's a Will... There's a Fray
- Superman #329 (November 1978) - I Have Met The Enemy... And He Is Me! and The Secret of the Talking Car
- Superman #330 (December 1978) - The Master Mesmerizer of Metropolis!
- Action Comics #490 (December 1978) - No Tomorrow For Superman
- Action Comics #491 (January 1979) - A Matter of Light and Death
- Superman #331 (January 1979) - Lockup at 20,000 Feet
- Action Comics #492 (February 1979) - Superman's Secret Afterlife
- Superman #332 (February 1979) - The Eternity Cage
- Action Comics #493 (March 1979) - The Metropolis UFO Connection
- Action Comics #494 (April 1979) - The Secret of the Super S
- Action Comics #495 (May 1979) - Attack of the Ultimate Warrior
- DC Comics Presents #14 (October 1979) - Judge, Jury... and No Justice!
- The Superman Story (1979) - The Life Story of Superman
1980-1986
- DC Comics Presents #57 (May 1983) - Days of Future Past
- DC Comics Presents #67 (March 1984) - 'Twas the Fright Before Christmas
- DC Comics Presents Annual #3 (1984) - With One Magic Word
- Superman: The Secret Years #1 (February 1985) - Dreams and Schemes and Feeling Proud!
- Superman: The Secret Years #2 (March 1985) - Reach Out and Touch
- Superman: The Secret Years #3 (April 1985) - Terminus
- DC Comics Presents #80 (April 1985) - A World Full of Supermen!
- Superman: The Secret Years #4 (May 1985) - Beyond Terminus
- DC Comics Presents #85 (September 1985) - The Jungle Line
- Superman Annual #11 (1985) - For The Man Who Has Everything
- World's Finest #323 (January 1986) - Afraid of the Dark
- DC Comics Presents #97 (September 1986) - Phantom Zone: The Final Chapter
- Superman #423 & Action Comics #583 (September 1986) - Whatever Happened To The Man of Tomorrow?
Compilation Volumes
- Showcase Presents: Superman Family - Volume 1 (October 2005)
- Superman/Batman: Saga of the Super Sons (December 2007)
Miscellaneous
- Not Brand ECHH #7 (April 1967) - The Origin of Stuporman
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